Flowers, advice and a little conundrum.

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Most weekends we drive to Mike’s grandma’s house and spend some time with her and do a few chores to help out.  She has a lovely garden of flowers surrounding her home, which we weed and also mow the lawns.  Often she sends us away with floral gifts, food (she’s an amazing baker) and trinkets.  A few weeks back we popped in and she was out.  We did some yard work for her – and a day or so later I discovered that the garden bed I’d weeded was actually full of seedling flowers!  Such a novice!  She was totally ok with it though… phew.

Yesterday she cut some beautiful roses and dug up a few spring bulbs for us to plant in our own garden.  She knew exactly where the submerged flowers were hiding… It was really nice to sort of inherit these plants.  We gathered some seeds from a tree and have some now germinating in a dark cupboard.

I love that no matter what you pop into the ground here – it’s basically predestined to shoot up and grow like magic.

Mike’s out fishing at the moment – and is keen to bring back some trout.  It was a bit chilly to start this morning…so I’ve been laying in, reading, chilling with Tess and a roaring fire.

Fishing reminds me, Mike taught me something interesting back in February while we were camping in Rotorua.  He had caught a massive rainbow trout, and some tourist gasped in horror when he tossed it (it was beautiful and large) back into the small creek.  He told them (and me too) that the Maori believe you should always through back the first fish caught (and you should thank Tangaroa – the god of the sea and all fish).

I think it’s a beautiful and respectful thing to do.

Later today we’ll go to the local famers market and I’ll hobble/wobble around and admire all the fresh fruit and veg that comes from these fertile soils…and dream of when we will have the ability to grow our own too.

Do you shop at the farmers market?  Is there something you hang out to buy from the market particularly?  I remember my mom used to buy this delicious polish sausage, that was spiced with pepper corns and was smoked… Keilbasa.  At the farmers market here they sell doughnuts, pastries, fried fish…etc.  It always smells amazing… 

Also some memorable moments from yesterday:

I was in the local library browsing books (seriously considering knitting!) when an old man turned to me and asked when I was due.  I said “less than three weeks”.

His response was:   “You’ll soon get through the one day of tears and screams and it will be all over”.

Thank you kind stranger.  Most straightforward pregnancy advice ever!

Last night Mike sat beside our bath tub, while I soaked and we had a long talk about what to expect when the baby starts to make his arrival.  We started on opposite ends of the spectrum in what we expected – and then by the end of our talk – we’d both flipped (not uncommon!) to take on the others perspective and take on suggestions from each side.

I’ve been seriously considering trying to have the baby at home – having been speaking with a few midwives and feel pretty cool with the idea, while Mike is more keen to go to the hospital.  By the end we’d both taken on the others concerns and were in opposite places…  We’re still not sure what we’ll 100% do, but are open to both situations…

Have you had a baby at home?  Was your experience nice?

He then got ready for a shower when I stood up from the bath and I caught this look on his face (horror) and I wondered if something gross was happening that I wasn’t aware of.

“Mike what is it?”  I looked down at my body to see what was stuck to me… I basically see nothing past my enormous belly.

“I just looked at your belly, and felt awful at how big the baby is and how sore it will be coming out – and just want for you and the baby to be safe”.

I remind him that it’s not all baby, some of it is fluid surrounding the baby, and placenta and that I really trust our midwife (she’s been great!) and feel that she will make sure we’re all safe and will be the best person to look out for our family no matter what happens on the day.

We are due in 2.5 weeks – and I’ve been having false contractions.

Shit is about to get real as they say…

As a male partner to your loved one giving birth, do you have any memories that stand out leading up to the due date/birth?  

I have heard that men can feel a lot of emotional anxiety on the day, and that it’s a very difficult time for them seeing their partner coping… I wonder how it will be for Mike on the day.  I know I’d be worried for him too if he were the one to bring the baby into the world…if only!!

10 thoughts on “Flowers, advice and a little conundrum.

    • Hi cbecker53 – thanks so much for the link. I actually had heard and read the word doula, but never really looked into it. We do have our midwife for 6 weeks after the baby is born, but the doula option sounds really great. I did a check and there is one here in NZ that would could get in touch with (and is local). That extra support would definitely help.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Curtis says he felt so proud of me. He said I was so strong, like a warrior. He was worried a lot before but never said it until later on. You will all do just fine no matter what you choose. Just be flexible. You’ll do great I’m sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I imagine a lot of men realise the endurance and will of a woman is pretty strong when they give birth. We may look dainty, but there is real grit there. Mike and I joke about trading places…and then he agrees he probably isn’t cut out for it…haha.

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